Life is Messy

Carl Jung said "I would rather be whole than good." This simple statement is so profound!

Every time we get on the other side of a challenge another "opportunity for growth" pops up. Resistance is always our first and defensive response. We want things to be black and white and tidy but instead get served myriad shades of continuous gray. We wish for "enlightenment". We think there is some kind of perfection to be achieved.

But all manifestation bears LOVE'S signature, no matter how frightening or awful its' appearance. Everything serves LOVE'S ultimate purpose. I trust LOVE and know that wisdom blooms with compassion.

In my desire for wholeness instead of goodness, I relax my expectations of myself and others. I work with my resistance to "what is". Instead, I intend to embrace reality with awareness. From the vantage point of my heart, everything begins to look like LOVE. May my heart keep expanding to include it all, without judgment of self or others!

EARTH DAY 2015

Today is Earth Day! I appreciate this amazing planet! I am thankful for my body which is made from and sustained by Her! Take a moment....appreciate your body too! I am grateful for the stunning beauty She displays through myriad living beings, both animate and inanimate, and that I am able to perceive this wondrous array of whirling sacred energy! WOW!

 I also wanted to share a small way we can give back to Her. Today or any day, pick up a piece of trash and send a blessing to the hands that tossed it out. Believe me, you will feel blessed! Together we can beautify and uplift this miracle we call Planet Earth.

Ebb and Flow

Some days I am stagnant. Instead of bubbling over in cascading inspiration, the fountain merely trickles. The waters muddled, murky and still.

Inertia folding in on itself, stifling the tiniest call to action.

 I sigh and light a candle. 

I cloak myself in your Light.

Cracking my shell and peeking out into the light, my legs again wobbly and untested and my wings glued to my body.

I open again to cycles of death and rebirth in vulnerable multitudinous moments.

Courage to be born again and again and again...

"If we gain something, it was there from the beginning..."

"If we gain something, it was there from the beginning. If we lose anything, it is hidden nearby." ~ Ryokan

This quote encourages me to feel the truth of my wholeness. When we appear to be gaining "something", what we are truly gaining is awareness. Intention to be aware of the blessings that are already here could turn my days into a treasure hunt for all the good that I am not noticing.

I find it comforting to ponder that what we feel we have lost is not truly lost but only hidden from our awareness. If I react to a momentary estrangement from my partner, I will not notice the underlying love that informs our relationship. It has not disappeared, but only receded into the background. Focusing on the feeling of loss only ensures that it will continue.

When I savor this quote, I want to be at peace in this moment, trusting in all that appears to be and all that appears not to be. I let go of the struggle to get something, go somewhere or forcefully resist what is appearing. I take a deep breath and know that when I cannot feel the love or see the beauty, it's just hidden from view. That awareness is all I need to feel its Presence. 

Affirmations...1 minute read

Louise Hay says that when you first begin using positive affirmations, they rarely feel true and mostly feel awkward and uncomfortable. This is exactly why we need them in the first place! The metaphor of a garden is fitting: we begin by planting a seed and we know we have to water and nurture that seed repeatedly for it to grow into a beautiful plant. We don't run out into the garden to dig up the seed to see if it's growing yet....we trust that it is. And so it is with our positive affirmations. We stay committed to the process and have faith that it will bear fruit. As you transform your negative beliefs through this process, miracles can and do happen!

Begin with a small goal of 2 verbal and/or written repetitions of one affirmation. That's it! There is a good chance that you will be inspired to do more but it's OK if you don't. What's important is to just stick with your daily 2 repetitions.

The body can't be truly healthy without a healthy mind. A healthy mind brings the happiness that makes our body cells smile with joy!

My Core Values

1. Spiritual Connection ~ I value being Divinely Guided. I create time every day to nurture and strengthen this connection.

2. Loving Kindness ~ I value verbally expressing and acting on the highest love in my heart.

3. Courage ~ I value fearlessly acting on my Inner Guidance.

4. Inspired Creativity ~ I value Infinite Divine Possibility and Unlimited Creative Expression in all things.

5. Emotional Honesty ~ I value self awareness and non judgment of what is so.

Reviewing my Life Purpose and Core Values on a daily basis is inspiring me and providing a daily self evaluation process. I read these statements in the morning to remind me of what brings joy into my life. And when I review my day at night, I have a yardstick by which to analyze how I measured up to my chosen ideals.

One of my responsibilities is taking my 3 year old grandson to day care, after my daughter drops him off. I give him breakfast and make his lunch. Yesterday morning, I was feeling tired and impatience flared when his natural curiosity manifested as a new question every other minute! :-)

That evening, I recalled this as I was journaling about my day. Feeling that I had not lived up to my Core Value of Loving Kindness, I determined that I would be mindfully aware with him the next day, no matter how I felt. We had a wonderful time together, despite my feeling tired again, and this experience paved the way for a joyful day.

Being mindful of my Core Values and Life Purpose sets my sails to catch the best winds and determines the quality of  my whole life. I am choosing where I want to go and how I will get there. I am living with intention. I have a vision!

Finding strength to live from my core values ~

Joan

Losing Weight with Self Compassion

I want to talk about the effects of negative self talk: the voice that criticizes and judges our bodies and eating habits. This inner critic makes us feel unworthy and undeserving of happiness until we achieve our weight loss goals. This is the voice that makes us feel awful when we look at ourselves in the mirror and piles it on after we over-eat!

This destructive inner dialog has played a major role in keeping us stuck in our unhealthy relationships with food and our bodies. When we eat too much, or eat a “forbidden” food, we add an additional layer of shame to our predicament. And then the shame itself, not the overeating, drives us to over-eat again!

We can begin to interrupt this negative pattern by being willing to accept ourselves as we are right now! This feels like a paradox! How can we achieve our weight loss goals if we feel OK as we are? Don’t we need to criticize ourselves and make ourselves bad, wrong and not enough in order to succeed? The simple answer is an emphatic “NO”!

The unhealthy habits we have engaged in are an attempt to take care of ourselves! We are not bad or weak willed for succumbing to these powerful urges!  The flood of feel good brain chemicals, provide immediate relief for low blood sugar, physical pain, fatigue and emotional stress. But because this is a temporary fix, we need to repeat the cycle, fueling a downward spiral. The pain of being stuck in these destructive habits can motivate us to devise and practice new strategies to soothe ourselves physically or emotionally without food! This takes self awareness and the willingness to do things differently.

 The food industry wants and needs us to buy their toxic, chemical laden food.  It has devised myriad ways to tempt us and get us addicted to a lethal brew of fat, sugar and salt. This is not our fault!

We are innocent and doing the best we can, given the awareness, understanding and knowledge we have gleaned. This is what creates a foundation for healing these unhealthy habits. And the point of power is always in the present moment! So let us forgive ourselves right now as we learn new ways to soothe ourselves without food.

  God’s love for us is not conditional on losing x amount of pounds, yet we feel we need to make constant withdrawals from our own bank of healthy, self acceptance and self esteem. Ironically, the more we criticize ourselves, the harder it is to lose weight.

 Becoming aware that we are judging ourselves is the first step in changing these well worn, neurological grooves in our brains. Forging new, healthy pathways of self kindness and compassion takes practice. Establishing these positive mental habits will encourage us to eat only when we are hungry and stop eating when we are full. We can learn to listen to our bodies and trust what they tell us.  We deserve to talk to ourselves lovingly, no matter what our shape or size!

The next time you look at yourself in the mirror, look deeply into your eyes and say: “I am willing to love and accept you the way God loves you, (or your choice of Higher Power) exactly as you are.” This new practice is sure to feel awkward at first, but if you stay with it, you will not only support a sustainable, healthy weight loss, but also positively impact every area of your life!